[情報] 前妻貓王之女發表了感言
看板KingofPop (麥可傑克森 - Michael Jackson)作者yiersan (一二三)時間16年前 (2009/06/27 07:45)推噓8(8推 0噓 1→)留言9則, 8人參與討論串1/2 (看更多)
Lisa Marie說14年前MJ跟她聊她爸死因時預言自己也會那樣死 (prescription drugs)
還有她因為感到無法改變MJ感到巨大的壓力 導致她提出離婚 但她一直愛著他
如果有人可以整片翻譯更好
她的blog如下
http://tinyurl.com/l54btw
-----------------------
He Knew.
Years ago Michael and I were having a deep conversation about life in
general.
I can't recall the exact subject matter but he may have been questioning me
about the circumstances of my Fathers Death.
At some point he paused, he stared at me very intensely and he stated with an
almost calm certainty, "I am afraid that I am going to end up like him, the
way he did."
I promptly tried to deter him from the idea, at which point he just shrugged
his shoulders and nodded almost matter of fact as if to let me know, he knew
what he knew and that was kind of that.
14 years later I am sitting here watching on the news an ambulance leaves
the driveway of his home, the big gates, the crowds outside the gates, the
coverage, the crowds outside the hospital, the Cause of death and what may
have led up to it and the memory of this conversation hit me, as did the
unstoppable tears.
A predicted ending by him, by loved ones and by me, but what I didn't predict
was how much it was going to hurt when it finally happened.
The person I failed to help is being transferred right now to the LA County
Coroners office for his Autopsy.
All of my indifference and detachment that I worked so hard to achieve over
the years has just gone into the bowels of hell and right now I am gutted.
I am going to say now what I have never said before because I want the truth
out there for once.
Our relationship was not "a sham" as is being reported in the press. It was
an unusual relationship yes, where two unusual people who did not live or
know a "Normal life" found a connection, perhaps with some suspect timing on
his part. Nonetheless, I do believe he loved me as much as he could love
anyone and I loved him very much.
I wanted to "save him" I wanted to save him from the inevitable which is what
has just happened.
His family and his loved ones also wanted to save him from this as well but
didn't know how and this was 14 years ago. We all worried that this would be
the outcome then.
At that time, In trying to save him, I almost lost myself.
He was an incredibly dynamic force and power that was not to be
underestimated.
When he used it for something good, It was the best and when he used it for
something bad, It was really, REALLY bad.
Mediocrity was not a concept that would even for a second enter Michael
Jackson's being or actions.
I became very ill and emotionally/ spiritually exhausted in my quest to save
him from certain self-destructive behavior and from the awful vampires and
leeches he would always manage to magnetize around him.
I was in over my head while trying.
I had my children to care for, I had to make a decision.
The hardest decision I have ever had to make, which was to walk away and let
his fate have him, even though I desperately loved him and tried to stop or
reverse it somehow.
After the Divorce, I spent a few years obsessing about him and what I could
have done different, in regret.
Then I spent some angry years at the whole situation.
At some point, I truly became Indifferent, until now.
As I sit here overwhelmed with sadness, reflection and confusion at what was
my biggest failure to date, watching on the news almost play by play The
exact Scenario I saw happen on August 16th, 1977 happening again right now
with Michael (A sight I never wanted to see again) just as he predicted, I am
truly, truly gutted.
Any ill experience or words I have felt towards him in the past has just died
inside of me along with him.
He was an amazing person and I am lucky to have gotten as close to him as I
did and to have had the many experiences and years that we had together.
I desperately hope that he can be relieved from his pain, pressure and
turmoil now.
He deserves to be free from all of that and I hope he is in a better place or
will be.
I also hope that anyone else who feels they have failed to help him can be
set free because he hopefully finally is.
The World is in shock but somehow he knew exactly how his fate would be
played out some day more than anyone else knew, and he was right.
I really needed to say this right now, thanks for listening.
~LMP
--
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