alex's diary no. 76
http://www.blur.co.uk/site.html -> diary
I remember the trees were just coming into blossom and there were gypsies
camping on the roadside at the top of the drive. It is five years to the week
since we first laid eyes on the farm and we brought it on our honeymoon
a month later. It is hard to remember exactly why we rose to it, or precisely
what we wanted from it. It was irresistible, probably the most romantic thing
we could have done, to leave our old lives behind and build a new one together
in what I took for the middle of nowhere. It has become the centre of the
universe and paradoxically the upshot of that starry-eyed plunge was a million
praticalities, and our dream has only been kept afloat by both of us pulling
our heads out of the clouds,
parking the aeroplane and taking care of business.
I suppose I might easily have stayed in covent garden for ever having bubble
baths instead of spending sunday afternoons in a field in the rain with
my head up a drain, but no one needs or enjoys his bath quite as much as
the man who has spent the afternoon at the other end of one.
Dreams of "happily ever after" never usually make any suggestions of work
to be done, but we all need something to do. As soon as we have something
to do, we can happily do nothing, which is the best thing. A nice house
with the mains plumbing and a cellar that didn't have things living in it
probably would have attracted all the wrong kind of people and most likely
suffocated us quitely.
After five years, we'd be dreaming about running away, sailing around
the world or moving to France, like all profoundly bored people do. Five years
of panic and confusion in dust, debris and mucky stuff and I finally feel like
I'm getting on top of it. There's nothing actually finished as yet,
and a lot of things haven't even been started. The five-year plan we drew up
five years ago is due to get under way next month. The dream is still way
on the horizon, the end of a rainbow we'll never get to, but where else to set
compasses towards?
I've been richer, more relaxed, more on top of things, but I've never been
less bored. After years tearing around the world in a band, I never imagined
life would get more interesting as it went on. I was expecting and anti-climax.
Maybe 10 years ago, if you'd told me blur world be down the drain, I'd never
have thought I'd find drains so satisfying.
By the time we get to adulthood, we've all seen everything. The great surprise
for me has been seeing things I recognise in a different way. The view has
got better. That's the best thing about the farm: you get to see the other.
--
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